


After

by leafykeen



Category: Voltron - Fandom, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Season 6 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-17
Packaged: 2019-05-24 04:50:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14947907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leafykeen/pseuds/leafykeen
Summary: Spoilers for season 6Keith and Allura talk





	1. Chapter 1

Keith and Allura sit down together. For the first time in months, her time. Two years, his time. He’s older, quieter, more reserved. She’s sad, and hurting. Lonely. Despite their long separation, and the changes they’ve been through, they’re still comfortable with each other. They’re both overtired, but too keyed up from their victory to sleep. So they talk. 

Keith talks about the time spent with his mother. The things he learned from her, both as a soldier, and as a son. He speaks with a fondness that surprises Allura. It’s hard to wrap her mind around the time they’ve spent in near isolation together, when so little time has gone by for everyone else. 

Allura listens, responds when necessary. Laughs at the stories of the antics of the wolf. Hums in sympathy when Keith talks about his father. 

Eventually, Keith is talked out. They sit in silence for a while, and Allura has nearly convinced herself that she should try to sleep, when Keith asks about Lotor. She doesn’t want to talk about him. It hurts. She feels foolish, and heartbroken at the same time. But she does talk. She finds herself telling him everything. Everything, from her initial distrust, to what she thought would be friendship. She is hesitant to tell Keith about the things she began to feel for him, cringes at the thought of the kiss they’d shared. Keith sits so close, she can feel his warmth. She feels safe, and suddenly, the idea of unburdening herself is so appealing. She let’s herself talk. Keith sits quiet and patient, and takes her hand when she can’t hold back a couple tears. 

They’re both spent. But they’re comfortable, secure in a friendship they hadn’t realized how much they’d missed. Allura tries not to think about how handsome this older Keith is, how gentle he is with her. The way his voice goes all soft when he speaks to her, even when they’re not alone. It’s too much, too soon after everything that’s just happened. 

But there’s always tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a lot more angst than I'd intended to write.

Allura is desperately lonely anymore. She can actually feel the loneliness physically, weighing her down. Exhausting her, but keeping her from sleeping. 

She knows it's her own fault. She knows that her team is the same. Well, mostly the same. She has never been close to Pidge or Hunk, but she knows, intellectually at least, that they'd be there if she asked them for help. If only she could actually convince herself that it was true. 

Shiro has his own problems, to say the least. She could never bring herself for ask him to focus what little energy he has on her. 

She can barely look at Lance. They'd grown much closer recently, and she does want to talk to him, but the thought of trusting him the way she'd trusted Lotor shoots ice into the pit of her stomach, and she can barely breathe. 

She isolates herself. She knows it's wrong. She knows she's making things worse. But she's not thinking about that. All she's thinking is that she's scared, and she hurts, and the only way to protect herself is to not give anyone else the power to hurt her again. 

Because that's what she'd done. With Lotor. She'd known about him. Even what little they knew of his history was shady at best, and she'd still handed him everything he needed to destroy her. She feels like some stupid, naive girl. 

So Allura let's the loneliness settle inside her. It sits inside her chest, and she learns to breathe around it. It weighs her down, but she makes the extra effort to stand up anyway. What else can she do? 

She has nightmares regularly. In nearly every one, her friends are not who they say they are. First it's Shiro. Then it's Lance. Eventually, even Coran isn't safe. Sometimes it's Keith leaving again, except this time, he doesn't come back. Sometimes she doesn't even remember what it was. She just knows that she's scared, and so completely alone. The loneliness in her chest grips tightly, and it feels like she shriveling from the inside out. Like she might cave in on herself, and she desperately, desperately wants...

What? 

It's apparent when an earth human hasn't slept, she's learned. You can see it in their eyes. That's not so for Alteans, so Allura doesn't worry about anyone finding out about her sleepless nights, until the day when someone does. Keith stops her, to talk, she assumes. She doesn't remember where she was going, or where she had come from. But it occurs to her, as it sometimes does, that they're not in the castle of lions, and her anxiety skyrockets. She doesn't let it show, of course. 

She gets the sense that Keith can tell anyway, though. His concerned look softens, and he asks her if she's alright. Allura hesitated for a moment. Keith has never changed. Not really. He's grown and matured, but she knows without hesitation that this is her Keith, and she has nothing to fear from him. She takes in his broader chest and stronger arms, and everything in her yearns to take that single step forward and let him hold her up for a while. She almost does it too, but the loneliness stabs her in the heart and reminds her that there are others around who will see this display of weakness and inevitably use it against her. 

She's not crazy. It's already happened. 

So she smiles brightly, and insists she's fine. She was distracted. She was thinking. Whatever she has to say. She makes a point to be as bright and cheerful as she can throughout the rest of the day, in case anyone else is becoming suspicious. They're not. She needn't have worried. 

Later that night, she thinks of Keith. She waits for the fear to settle in, but it doesn't. Her mind wanders to that first night after... everything. How'd they'd just been together. How he'd been with her. She let's the safety of that memory lull her to sleep. 

Tricking herself into feeling safe only works a couple times. Then it's back to late, lonely, anxiety-filled nights. One night is particularly bad, and thinking of Keith actually makes Allura ache more instead of less. The loneliness throbs within her until she thinks she might fall apart. She's wound so tight and holding herself so stiff, and knows she'll hurt tomorrow. That doesn't convince her to stop. Then there's a knock at her door. 

She gets up and wipes away her tears, still tense. She tries her best to look normal, and can only hope she succeeds. 

Allura opens her door to find Keith. She longs to throw herself into his arms, to ask him how he knew she needed him right then, and to beg him not to leave. She doesn't. She waits. He asks her if she's okay. She says of course she is. Keith very clearly doesn't believe her, and he tells her if she doesn't want to talk to him, that's fine, but she's very clearly not okay, and she needs someone. 

The grip of fear eases as Allura processes what Keith has said. He sees her. He cares. It's with those realizations that she gives herself permission to break. She tells him she's not okay. He leads her back into the room, and they sit together like they did that first night. Only now Keith's arm is tight around her back, and Allura grips his shirt while she cries into his shoulder. Once again, Allura finds herself telling Keith everything. With every admission of every fear, she feels her burden easing, and the grip of the loneliness loosening. 

If occurs to Allura that the opposite should be happening. She should be terrified of handing her weaknesses over to someone else like this. But this is Keith. Keith who, despite his flaws, had from the beginning been so protective of her. Keith whose deep voice has always gotten a little gentler when he spoke to her. He doesn't speak now. Right now, he just listen. But the way his other hand rests on her neck, right below her ear, fills her with the same comfort. 

She's told him everything, and they sit together in silence. Allura's used all her tears, and exhaustion settles in again. It's different this time, though. 

Keith begins to move, and anxiety takes hold. Anxiety that she's gone too far, told him too much, made him uncomfortable. 

But he's not leaving. He's not even letting go. He's reaching for a blanket to pull up over them. They relax together. Allura thinks Keith is mostly asleep when she slips her arms around his waist to settle in closer. He makes a little humming noise at that, and it makes her smile. And the loneliness begins to dissipate. 

**Author's Note:**

> What did everyone think of the new season?


End file.
